Making good decisions. Apparently I'm getting good at it.
It has been a while since I updated this blog, and as the title states, I have become a brand new person all over again. This past month has been a rollercoaster of emotions, hardships, and downright greatness! Let me take you back just a few weeks...
My baby girl was born a little over a month ago, and with my finances being what they were, I was scared that I would have to move to a cheaper place, maybe find a new job, and basically change things that I'd rather like to stay unchanged. I had been worried about money for almost six months straight already, and was getting extremely tired of stressing over it. Luckily things started looking up last month. I was able to qualify for financial aid, after being rejected on every other front, and now I actually don't have to work as much as I have had to in the past. I get to stay home for half of the week with my family, and really get to enjoy my life!
As great as that particular aspect of my life was getting, my health was starting to deteriorate. I still have a cough actually, but at least I'm not puking my guts out anymore. I'm not sure if it was bad food, poorly dressing for cold weather, the crap I have to deal with at work, or just stress in general, but something got me sick, and stuck around. Then of course, being at home as much as I was, I'm pretty sure that I was the reason for getting my partner sick. Not even a week after she felt ill, our friends that come over quite often started getting sick too. So our final days of summer went by without being able to have been enjoyed to their fullest, though they were enjoyed nonetheless.
Roughly two weeks ago, if it's even been that long (it's hard to tell as my days seem to blur into one another) two of my friends shared a birthday party. Grandma watched over my girl as Mommy and I prepared for a night to remember. Our mutual best friends, and godparents to our child were going because it was godfather's birthday, along with another one of our friends. A new club had just opened up and we had all decided that this was where the party would be held, even if it was an extremely non-busy Wednesday, or something stupid like that. In retrospect, nearly 90% of the night was absolutely spectacular, with only a brief period of general unhappiness.
Once back home, the party continued, and either video games were played, or movies were watched, some sort of combination of the two at least, and one by one each member fell asleep. My partner and I were still wide awake since we are both night owls, and so we went out for a cigarette. If you've read any of my unfinished blogs, you'll know that our relationship seemed to be going downhill, with just a flicker of happiness left. While standing outside however, with questions being asked and answered, something clicked back on. An idea that I had months ago, toyed around in my head again over the week that flew by before this night, and right then flowered into something I almost felt unprepared for. It happened in a way that I did not initially intend, dream about, picture in my head, it just happened. I asked her to marry me. When she said yes, everything made sense. It all fit, like the biggest puzzle of my life had finally put itself together. I know now, and am 100% sure that this was the best decision I have ever made. I love her.
Now, lying awake two hours after she left to go to BC with the aforementioned godparents, I am left with my daughter, and a lot of planning for the years to come. I feel right, like I'm back to normal, except this normal is new, and I'm thoroughly enjoying it.
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